We haven’t stopped having fun since our first adventure three years ago. And actually, even sitting in traffic is fun when you’re with your bestie.
my family is fucking cool
Whoa, I am a Real Mommy
This Week Was Pretty Productive
Jah went to Milwaukee to visit relatives without us, so we tried to keep busy. We bought our tickets to the Philippines, got old computers fixed, cleaned out closets, got massages, watched a movie (Moneyball) in a real theater and went to the Prospector for karaoke. I sang “Suedehead” by Morrissey and it’s been in my head since.
Three of My Favorite Things in One Picture
It’s My Sissy’s Birthday
Jah Got Serenaded
The artist Airika played this song on her mini accordion especially–and only for–Jah because she thought he was so cute! She’s an amazing artist, and he loooooved it. I’m sure even at 9 months old he knew how special that was.
Sorry I Was Out of Commission…Had a Baby and All
My Toes Look Like Vienna Sausages (and Other Pregnant Pauses)
One day I will take a photo of my toes
And look at it years later, wrinkle my nose
They look like they should be stuffed in a can
Or cooking in a campfire frying pan.
It’s not the only thing that’s weird about me
So many changes come with a growing belly
There’s the obvious fact; my clothes don’t fit
And oh, frabjous day! My humongous tits
I am puffy everywhere; my fingers the most
And every painkiller is an improbable dose
I got carpal tunnel, that’s no fun
And swelling everywhere comes from the scorching sun
I can’t eat sushi, raw milk or caffeine
And still I’m gaining five pounds a week it seems
Bending over’s a challenge, so’s wiping my butt
My walk is a waddle, no longer a strut
When counting down weeks, days seem like years
And every minute a new stretchmark appears
I’m not complaining, Jah’s all I’m looking forward to
And on his birth day, my whole life will be like new!
Remix: Santiago Bose
I love the Oldies
Last weekend, Adam and I were in a car accident in Barstow, on the 247 by the Mojave desert. Because it was a Saturday and there were no body repair shops around, I had my car towed to Loma Linda, where my grandmother lives. We ended up sleeping in Loma Linda and getting both my blown tires fixed.
At around midnight (my grandmother sleeps at 9 p.m.) we stole what tasted like 50-year-old Moet from my grandma’s top shelf and drank it with orange juice (it was nasty). My grandmother told Adam to sleep in the den, and I got the guestroom. Before we left, she asked Adam to change a bunch of lightbulbs.
Today, my mom called my grandma from the Philippines to ask what she thought of Adam.
My grandma said, “Well, he’s gay.”
Mom replied, “What do you mean he’s gay?!?”
“He said so himself!” My grandma said indignantly. “He admitted it, right after he lost American Idol”
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